since yesterday after setting my foot on the my kolo mee paradise that i was longing for months back.i became emotionally unstable.i duno why and im still trying to find the answer.its not that im not satisfied about my life,i mean i have all the things that i want.i indulge in almost everything i liked except for an ipod.but somehow i suddenly felt that everythings so pointless.living 19 years on this planet.what have i done?what have i contributed to the public?i mean out there in this world.some people around my age or polly younger are already earning money themselves or contributing all they have to the society,to make the world a better place.but here i am contributing nothing.am i looking at a picture thats too big to me?i really wished i was capable of making the world a better place.but how?i really have no idea where to start from.all of a sudden i felt so alone in this big wide world. striving to survive.

all the friends around me seem to be forever confident with their lives and what they do or aim for.but im always blurred about my future.at times i think i will succeed but there are also times that it is as it being swallowed up by the boogey monster.nowhere to be seen.i salute my friends that are so forever calm and cool.they always have plans for their paths ahead.if there is a remedy for it,i will do what every it takes to have it.

i could use some company for the time being.but who?you he she him her they them it?where are my strength that i used to have?i know im very weak mentally but i was never this weak before.what has happened to me??too much kolo mee??