Sunday 30 December 2007

just moved into ma new house.and its nice. =)

Friday 28 December 2007

had dinner with mr julian and the rest of the prodex comittee and its was awesome.just by joining this annual exhibition,ive learnt alot both from my seniors and mr julian.you should also be good to your lecturers coz that where you really learn from.not the textbooks.trust me.

sate kajang is damn nice and boy would you believe.there was like 25 of us and guess whats the amount of the bill?RM417...4 note gone just by eating sate...hahahha.but its really nice and lucky its the lecturers that are paying.its the first time i tried venision and rabbit sate.haha.venision is kinda hard and rabbit rocks.its slightly softer that chicken.hhaha.you should try. =)

im moving out soon.and dads coming. =)

Thursday 27 December 2007

sometimes i too dont understand myself well.i can comfort my friends when they are sad and listen to them.but sometimes i too get sad and whats worse,i dont even know what to do.ever since i came to kl,i breakdown more often than before.i dont know whats got into me but i will try my best to find out.i dont understand why i still cant get over you despite that theres so many girls both hot and normal passing by my path every once in a while.my friends keep telling me to let go of you but i just cant.and i dont know why.its like theres a bond that keeps you from moving away from a certain thing.i wish i can getover with this nightmare.everytime when im almost close to getting over you,you just pop by and become very nice to me.its like you appear all of a sudden from no where.what do you call that?fate?destiny?or what?i dont know.i will leave that for you to guess.ive heard that youre into someone now but what can i do?all i can do is to pray for you that you and that lucky guy can be happy together and no quarreling.

theres nothing good about me.the only thing that im slightly better at is prolly listening to those who are sad.but who will listen to me when im sad?who can i spill my heart to?coz no one really understands me.neither do i.some say im a good friend but why do i often get stabbed behind by my own friends?or even my besties?and why do i always get all the blame when things tend to go wrong?are these problems that being a good friend have to bear?

do you have a friend that will wake up in the middle of the night and listen to you cry and spill you heart out?do you have someone that will support you when you are really broke?do you have a freaking friend that will help you call a girl thats travelling overseas and lie to her about how good you are?and that she should consider you?do you have a friend that will take the blame even though its not all his fault?and will he forgive you when you backstabbed or said something bad behind him?do you have a friend that will call you are sad and he gets scolded for his phone bills?

is this what i deserve?what mistake have i made?im turning into a crazy lunatic soon.trust me.

Tuesday 25 December 2007

stayed at home tonight.james asked me to join them at genting for the countdown and jason asked me to join him and his bro at ruums for clubbing and i turned both of them down.i wasnt in the mood for both.and im saving money to shop.hahah.why does topman in uk have so so so many selection and topman malaysia is so lack of variety.crap.and topman uk doesnt ship into malaysia.arrgghh.


might be meeting up with ah pui and hanging out with jessey if she plans to meet up with me.theres so many stuff yet to be bought.planning to get a levis retro cap but ive made a deal with randy.only either one of us can get.if he gets it first den i will have to kiss goodbye to the cap.when will springfield open.arrrggghhh.hope that i could at least get 2 more shirts from topman and 1 from gap before i go back kuching. =) but im so dead broke.

heres some of the pics from the product design 2007.






Sunday 23 December 2007

shopped the whole afternoon and night at pavilion with randy.collected my free gift from paul frank.and i was so damn pissed.coz the image was the same with the one i bought the other day.sigh.anyway.treat me well and i might give you the free gift.and its no at all cheap.the price tag is still there.its 90 bucks.


anyway.got myself a long sleeve from topshop. =) i am yet to get a matching jeans for it.planning to get another long sleeve from either gap or ck.and i will try to save as much as i can to get a shirt from springfield.whens the outlet in pavilion going to open?how about the one in the gardens?does anyone have any clue??

Friday 21 December 2007

im knackered.went shopping the whole afternoon and i only bought a tee from paul frank.and the price isnt nice at all.have to go down again and collect the free gift this sat.i am yet to shop for my shirt and jeans.aarrrrgghh...i need moneyyy~~~i will upload the pic of ma shirt soon.very tired tonight.gotta sleep coz ive got class at 8 tomorrow and its math tut.the tutors face is like a horses.im so evil -_-

Thursday 20 December 2007

called mum just now and i told her that i was going to shop for clothes tomorrow and i was surprised that she didnt ask me not to spend so much.ahah.so maybe i can indulge in stuff i like eii.

was quite shocked when mr julian said that the robotic assignment was cancelled as there still to many groups yet to finish it.wth.was quite upset but what can i do.oh wells.look at the other side.at least i dont have to do the report.

ah puis coming to kl tomorrow night.hope i have time to meet up with him and dads coming on the 27th.yeah.planning to change my phone when i get back coz this phone is going to condemn soon.and i nearly missed my lecture this morning coz my phone went crazy and my alarm did not go off.crap.but what phone should i change?

poor randy.hahahahhah.get well soon and next time dont play basketball after your dinner. -_-

dear ivanna.what he did to you i couldnt believe too.cheer up and stay strong.im sure you will get over it.its nobodys fault aite =)

Tuesday 18 December 2007

lots of stuff yet to do be.3 assignments yet to be passed up.and its due this week.cool.that day while walking with joy at pavilion,something made me piss off.my shoes are on sale.its 350 only.bull****.and i dont even want to how much i bought it.

anyway.christmas is so so so near.going to do last minute shopping this thursday and ive only got 300 to shop.crap.200 from my own and 100 from the credit card.maybe mum would allow me to buy more if im good.on the other side,im planning to get christmas presies.so you better be a good girl or guy and pray hard that you be in my list.coz its limited.haha.but still i will only be going back around cny.coz i still have classes.

theres like so many stuff i would like to buy.first im gonna buy a formal like casual wear shirt from topshop or fcuk.a long sleeve tee from gap.another from ck or armani x.and prolly a normal tee from graffiti-tee.and i need a new fragrance.prolly from armani or ck.

anyway.shopping at mid valley and klcc this thursday.who wants to join.


love is like clapping.you need two sides to do so.both sides have to be willing to give in.forgiveness is perhaps the gretest gift of all.

Saturday 15 December 2007

im still on the road to recovery after yesterdays exihibition.my voice is still coarse as i had to brief everyone on how to fly the airplane and instruct them.and for your information,our booth was the main attraction and even the robotic arm were not able to compete with us.there were lots people queuing up just to fly the flight simulator.some were quick learners but some especially girls had difficulty mastering it.some of them even covered their eyes with their hands and screamed when their plane was about to crash.

try repating the same instructions for 9 hours non-stop and you will understand how i feel and its a miracle that none of us lost our voices.lucky randy too could fly well so he helped me in explaining it to the crowd.

if anyone of you think that im just flattering myself then youre wrong.because you werent competing and we were just 1st years and there were 4th years with at least a diploma.think about that.even mr julian was astonished.he was grateful that we offered him our aide as he was planning not to do the simulation.if he had not done so,we wouldnt be so famous and this years prodex would just be another ordinary one.

julian told us that 8tv told hm that they might plan to have a special report and us as the special guest.coz they too were amazed by what we did and so as he deputy miniter of science whom i forgot his name.not only that,it will also be the first 2 seater aircraft made in malaysia.but if theres going to be a special report then we would be very busy.and they will have to pay for our expenses.coz if we were to fund it ourselves,then we would be doing another crap out as materials are very exp.we planned to make a platform if they would fund the whole programme.hope that they would have a special report.

pray for us guys.thank you =) goodnight.

ps.sally get well soon yea.take care.kui yin says she misses you alot.well.i miss you too.haha.take care and drink more water.

Friday 14 December 2007

im prolly very very happy and also abit sad now.

=)
my group b7,me,denion,randy,yoeu lun,eng tseng and adam had just WON 1st PRIZE in catogery B consisting of 26 groups.and we were also the overall champion and there were 76 groups including mine participating.unbelievable.not only that.were only 1st years and everyones like 3 or 4 years older.they are all our seniors showing off their final year projects in the competition.thank you kok hong and eric our seniors and mr julian tan our lecturer and those who helped.sorry for kok hong and eric as they only got 1st runner up.they really deserve the 1st prize.

=(
theres no one that i can share the happiness with.wished that you were here.who can i share with?give me an answer please.feel like breaking down.
yesterday was both great and miserable.they are going to announce the winners for prodex.hope that my booth will win.if it happens then we would be famous.1st year diploma students competing among 60 groups for final year advance diploma students and still win.god help us (=

Thursday 13 December 2007

rushed the flight simulator for prodex the whole afternoon.and skipped lab too.cant wait to see the inventions of the final year students tomorrow.there are so many cool stuff.CNC.ROBOTS.CAR ENGINES.AND A PROTOTYPE AIRCRAFT.cool.and it can actually fly.mr julian will be flying it.cant wait to see.hope that our group will be the winning group.pray that everything will be going smoothly as expected. =) everyone is invited to visit us at booth B7 this fri.thur is only for judges.

i want a microsoft zune.80gb one.who would like to buy me one??

Tuesday 11 December 2007

DEMC test was damn easy.prolly the easiest.i think i could get a 100 of at least 80 marks.i dint even studied.haha.wished that all the tests were as easy as this.

HAPPY 18th BIRTHDAY to WILSON and PENG YANG
HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY to YUVARAJ

=)

Monday 10 December 2007

visiting pc fair today was total fun.got there earlier so i went to look for clothes alone while waiting for my friends.lots of ppl at the pc fair and hot girls too.there was one which was quite pretty at the logitech store where i bought my mouse.you wont want to know the price.she had tis innocent look and sweet smile which was prolly the main attraction.she was dressed in white too.and i bought the mouse from her ^_^ should have taken a photo with her.she introduced this mouse to me.but after buying this mouse im broke.this mouse rocks.it has the feeling that ull definitely like it when you get a grip of it.

the small thing beside it is the receiver and it comes with a pouch too.the receivers small ei?nice??go get 1 too.

miss sia.im really very very sorry for what i said.i hope that you will forgive my stupidness. =( sorry.

Saturday 8 December 2007

today was rather busy.had a quick dinner with mr julian.after that around 8 we started doing the xplane link at luns house until 12.and flying the flight simulator was cool.especially with the controller.

presentation again later at 8.OMG.im tired of presentations.i need a break.i need kit kat.

1 more test to go.prodex is next week.which will be a very busy one.and prolly i might have to skip classes to prepare the simulator.

jieying sorry i couldnt make it.will meet you this sunday aite?sorry. =(

you are what that matters the most to me.

Friday 7 December 2007

pc fairs here.haha.gonna get some gadgets.i need an IPOD...but dad wont buy me 1.sobs.coz he says i will be addicted to it.haha.that is for sure.but anyway.hes gonna be sorry for what he just said.i called him up just now asking for money to buy mouse and cooler pad and he asked whether ive used my credit card coz theres no statement yet.i told him i used twice and he said 2 times only?im going to use more now*tsk tsk*.hahaha.clothesssss.

denion.thank you for all your effort in the assignment.we all owe you a big 1 bro.its you turn to be sick now ei?hahaha.anyway.get well soon and take more rest.dont stress yourself.weve got so many things undone and if ure sick,whos gonna replace you?xplane,robotic arms report and so on.take care yes.

Thursday 6 December 2007

Met up with the only kid yet to be an adult from our gang,XINGz.haha.something really stupid happened to us.i asked if he wanted to go into the condom house in mid valley and he was damn happy.but when we got in…the girl asked for our ic.i went in without prob.but when he saw xings ic.XX1220 she said 对不起,你还不够岁,很抱歉。。。 I was like okay….xing explain to him that its only a few more days.but she say he cant go in.hahahcrap.anyway.we had baskin-robbins and i told him that he better eat as much baskin-robbins as he could coz jie ying says theres no br in sg.haha.he bought a tee from s&k and another from graffiti-tee.i wanted to get 1 too.but they dont have the sizes that i want.crap.saw a long sleeve tee from ck.and I think im going back to buy it.its nice and its on sale.hahah.had dome and its nice.

Hanging out with the kid makes me think of our times when we used to be besties even now we still are.but we are far apart.we used to camp together and watch each others back.we play we fall we cry together.i wonder how long will i be able to cherish it.we always argued but that was just for fun and we never really quarreled.and hes prolly the best among my besties.

Happy 18th birthday to my dearest friend.sze wan joo.one of my best friends too.the 3 of us used to be scouts and camped together at school and other places too.shes finally an adult.ahhaha

While on the way back from kl sentral.i saw a man walking an Indian to the platform and into the train.when they got into the train no one gave their seats.for a moment I thought hes gonna stand all the way.but thankfully, a good Samaritan stood up and offered his place to him.god bless that guy for being so kind.i too helped a few blind before and honestly,you will feel that your day is brighter and that youre so much lucky compared to them.for those who didnt even bother to help the need,bear this in mind.put yourselves in their shoes.think of it.supposely 1 day you became blind and you wanted to go to a place.will you wish that someone would just hold your hand and guide you along so that you dont have to walk with fear.for the fear that you might walk the wrong way,you might fall down,you might knock into something??think of it and stop being so selfish.is standing up and giving your seat so hard??is holding a blinds hand so hard?will it kill you just to help them??if its so..den I dont even know how many times have I died.

Dear girl.its your turn to be sick ei??haha.anyway.get well soon.too much clubbing I reckon.haha.coz the air ventilation isnt good.take care yea miss sia.cheers.god bless you. =)

Wednesday 5 December 2007

yesterday was rather crap.woke up with a severe headache and when i got to the lecture hall,i felt so cold.never felt like that before.i studied so hard but when the papers were given out,my mind was empty.i tried hard to reminsce everything but i cant.stupid headache.skipped both english and french as i was too tired.crap.


denion says i have a fever coz i feel so cold even in my own room which i normally dont.crap.didnt even eat anything until just now when randy bought me chicken porridge from mcd which i asked him to.thanks a million.it was nice though.

xings coming tomorrow and might be meeting up with him.promised to bring him to the pc fair at klcc this weekend as i told him it was bigger than the ones in kuching.

Tuesday 4 December 2007

yesterday was rather fun.fooling around at canteen 2 and being the centre of attention.i think i was prolly the one who laughed the loudest.sorry.

engineering science today was piece of cake.turn out to be easier than i thought.math test at 1pm.which i doubt that i will pass.coz i hardly prepared.

still rushing my robotic research presentation.wished i had 30 hours a day.24 is hardly enough for me.i need leisure and sleep badly.jieyings coming on this wed.and i dont know if i will be meeting up with her coz im very busy.mid term tests this week and next.presentation this sat.

im still finding a converter to convert my video clip of the robotic arm so that i can upload it u.

my dearest sister,roslyn.when will you be coming back to school?theres so many thing that needs you.coz im no longer the treasurer and the supplier wants to collect the payment.you just missed your mid term test. ^_^ good.i think its best that you quit your studies.oh ya,1 more thing girl,which i think you might not know.no one in group A likes you anymore.which is quite sad.coz even your very best gang kicked you out of their group.which is rather sad.but dont worry,youre still in the same group with me in the lab practical.coz i cant kick you :P

and 1 more thing.ive received news that youre inviting peeps to go clubbing eii??well,if you were to pay for the cover and drinks.hmm maybe i will forget about our hatred and join you ei?since its free.haha.

and youre inviting people to starbucks eii??i envy you alot.coz youve got a good boyfriend who has a platinum card.hahaha.

Saturday 1 December 2007

controlling the robotic arm this morning was total fun.my friends coordinated while i moved the robotic arm.will upload the clip later as im yet to convert it.just finish studying partially.math is like so damn hard with so many equations to memorise.OMG.and i am yet to prepare to my engineering science test which falls on monday.1 day left.crap.i need motivation.

jordin sparks debut album is nice.shes only 17 as her bday is on the 22nd of dec.shes the winner of the 6th season of american idol.you should listen to her songs.tattoo and this is my now.both songs are nice.shes only 17 and shes earning money now.while me on the other hand,is still studying under full sponsorship.by my dad.

springfield clothes are like damn nice.but its not available in malaysia.arrghh.dont know if isetan has it.

joy says that im thinner now. =) called my gay partner yesterday.haha.he still sounds gay.joy said that my hair colour is nice and it suits me.

damn tired.gonna head for bed now.ciaoz


story of my life

Wednesday 28 November 2007

ive got headache again.arrr.crap.whats wrong with me.tests next week.assignments yet to pass up.aarrgh.feel damn lazy now.

just finished watching transformers.its nice those who are currently or plan to pursue mechatronics should watch.watch the robots.watched 1st part of ratatouille.it nice too.outdated you will think of me.yes i admit so okay.i was rather busy that time so i missed both of it when it was screening.

sometimes i really salute friends around me.one minute you see them breaking up.another you see them holding hands with a new girl.its funny how they can say i love you forever and stuff like that and yet they can forget just forget about it so easily.breaking up is prolly just like changing their clothes.just take it off and wear a new one.

am i a prodigy or am i just an idiot?
math is hard...arrgghh.i got a 6/10 for my english presentation but i cant complain coz i did not prepared well for it.so i deserve it. :(

was having a sexy time controlling the robotic arms.but its freaking hard.weve go 2 hours left to master it and we have to make it write something out.i will upload the clip when its done.

jordin sparks is nice.her album.niceee...

i dread headaches.crap.aarrgghhh.

Tuesday 27 November 2007

mid term tests are coming soon and im still slacking.crap.2 more weeks.aarggghh.digital and microprocessors was crap.its getting more and more complicated.flip-flops was easy.but the microprocessors part was hell.trying so hard to understand.even paying full attention in lecture dint do much help.is there anyone who would like to help me with it?i will be grateful.

have been sleeping in classes lately.especially lectures.i dont know why am i so tired.arrrr.everythings so upside down now.crap.

went out with jessey,her friends and mine.lucky we went to mid valley and the gardens.coz if we were in klcc,we might be in the middle of the hindraf demonstration.which is quite scary.alot were injured.an inspector had 2 gashes on his head and needed 12 stitches.they used tear gases and water cannons.7 police cars were damaged.this is madness.the demonstraters said that they will demonstrate again.wth.

Saturday 24 November 2007

just got back from town.went out with dad just now and he will be leaving for macau tomorrow.just now i told him that i wanted to get a new mouse as mines going to die soon and a cooler pad.he said ok and he asks me to buy a better one so that it lasts longer.thank you.hes gonna pay for my speakers too.but i think i will only ask him to pay part of it la.i will pay the rest.im planning to get an edifier or maybe harman/kardon sound sticks.i like the sound sticks.damn nice.but its 5++ omg.gotta start saving now.

planning to ask my dad to apply a standard chartered gold card for me because now they have a limited edition one.with batman on it.shit i want it.

P.S. my dearest piglet.you cant compare me with your boy coz im way way way better than he is.and im more hugable than he is.this is a fact.

charlene,get well soon.cheer up =) take care.god bless you.
just finished my proposal at luns house.a short presentations tomorrow.how to introduce robots?OMG.its so hard.

went to jw mariott to find my dad just now.will meet with him again tomorrow.he brought my clothes which i accidentally left it at my aunts house in sg.how careless of me.

cant wait for the year end sale.saving money to shop. :) you better start doing so too.

steve mclaren got sacked.yeah.serve him right for not letting david beckham play.kicked him out of the 1st team then later begged him to come back.idiot.why not let him play the whole match?let him come u for only 22 mins?he made a perfect corner for crouch.but they might even won the match if he was in the 1st team.this is a good lesson for england too.for letting an idiot taking charge.Sven-Göran Eriksson was better.

Friday 23 November 2007

:(
group presentation today dint go well either.dint know who to blame.prolly its mine coz i dint really help them out.sigh.

everyone will be going back to kuching soon and ive still got half sem.

1 week since i had dunkin donuts

broke

:)
starting a new electronics lab session next week.cant wait.

dad is coming tomorrow.and im meeting him up on sat morning as he has a LG dinner at jw mariott.

jasmine 'fish' leong will be in kl for her promo tour on jan 5 and will be having a concert at bukit jalil next year.the date is yet to be confirmed.

the digital electronics & microprocessors lecturer plans to change the assignment into an individual one so it means that i wont have to see her face.OMG.yes.

Thursday 22 November 2007

was quite pissed yesterday.dont wanna think about it.the stupid girl and the bloody seniors.prolly wasnt my day.hope todays presentation goes on smoothly.

i wana go to my chemical romances concert and fish leongs concert in singapore or at least one of of them.but im so broke.aahhhhhh.i need jackpot now =(

anyway.dads coming over in a day or two.he will be staying overnight in kl as he is on a transit to macau.travelling again.i wanna go =(

piglets coming too.nice.cant wait to see her.prolly prettier than before.will i recog her when i see her?or i might just pass by her without noticing.ahah.pitlet.dont forget our deal.haha.i cant find a cardboard with that size.OMG.

stupid debbies coming over too.5th dec.ahah.

msged michelle yesterday and she said she might be studyin in taylor next year.joo might be coming too.tourism.omg.with them around.i think i wont be that bored anymore.but still if they study there,its far.i have to sit an hours train ride to see them.crap.

mid term test is coming and i dread math and digital electronics & microprocessors.but i heart basic eletronics and engineering science.

this weeks rather hectic and so will the following weeks.have to study for test.assignments yet to be done.somemore have to help mr julian.prodex is coming soon.and that will increase the burden too. -_- stress kills.

Tuesday 20 November 2007

math today was still okay.managed to get everything into my mind.and it is really somethig to be proud of.coz i seldom manage to get everything into my peanut sized brains.especially math.

miss tan said that only 2 person got A for the individual presentation and god i know that i didnt really prepared well enough so i guess the letter just slipped from my grasp.sigh.theres a group presentation this thur and i shall prepare well.

gotta wake up really early tomorrow because i will have to be at the train station at 6.45.adam will be waiting for me at maluri lrt station.and it takes more than 1 hour to reach there.have to go to secondary schools to hand out letters to request the permission to give talks.hope everything goes smoothly.

im starting to miss my family.sigh.but its okay.coz dad will be in town this weekend as he is going to macau for a vacation.

when you walk away,i count the steps that you take.do you see how much i need you right now.
one of my greatest dread is working along with people who are proud and boastful.can only talk but not do.i dont know how the heck you managed to get into my group.i duno what lame excuse did you give to the lecturer so that you can be in my group.who do you think you are?you want to be in my group without even telling me?ive enough with you.last semester,we were in the same freaking group for 5 freaking assignments and you dint even do anything.you just talk talk talk and after that you go back to your hometown.leaving us to do the rest.and when you came back,you complained to the lecturer that we werent cooperative.talk about that.im going to talk to the lecturer about this matter later.stupid bitch.thats the reason why I didnt include you in the list for the aircraft exhibition help out list,even though you studied aviation before.coz all you do is talk.and never do.even if you do.you do crap.

you keep judging other peoples english.how about yours?i think your standard is not even up to my 13 years old singaporean couz.yours suck big time.I PLAN TO IMMIGRATE MY FAMILY TO AUSTRALIA? My god.you cant even differentiate between headache and migraine.dilemma and problem.

and please,youre not even close to rich.wearing a levis swaroski isnt rich.wearing a rm350 esprit dress isnt either.if youre really rich,get a real louis vuitton bag and wear a rolex.wear armani jeans instead of levis.and I will salute you.is having a platinum card really that proud?do you really have to show of?take a picture of the card and upload it on your friendster?OMG.somemore the card isnt free.you have to pay?my dear,its only from public bank.theres nothing to be proud of.you dont have to go round telling people that your bf has a platinum.well,i have one too.and its free.if your card is issued by international banks like citibank,hsbc or standard chartered then I have nothing to say.yours is only local.get a titanium then.if youre really that rich.coz you cant apply for titanium.they give it to you.drive a harley davidson v-rod instead of a hyundai elantra which belongs to you bf.coz the v-rod is way more expensive than your car.

Monday 19 November 2007

Im typing this post in my kl bound train.im on my way back to kl.its been a hectic weekend for me.i was in sg to accompany my family as they are there for holi.i hardly shopped as I had to bring my grandparents around and not only that.i had to pushed granny as her legs are not that strong.my aunt suggested wheelchair for her but no one wants to push her.managed to meet stupid debbie for lunch and took pics of the christmas tree in ngee ann city with her.the pics are already on her blog so I wont have to upload it.but its not advisable to look at the pics as my eyes seems to be so small especially standing beside someone with big round weird eyes.haha.
dint manage to meet with charlene as I only smsed her on sun night and because of that I had not much time left in sg so we couldnt meet up.sorry yea.will meet you next time aite.


bought an esprit pants for myself and my lil bro.bought a springfield shirt for him too coz he likes white clothes and has been asking my mum to buy her one.i will get 1 more for him when I go down to pavilion.if theres a sale coz im so broke.and im yet to pay to rental and books and stuff.i am yet to get myself a nice shirt.

had a chat with sam and harry via msn.and after some of harrys advice,ive decided to hold on and continue caring for you.keeping the candle alight even though the wind is strong.im trying hard to stay strong too.hope you will try your best and stay strong too. =)
take care and god bless you.i shall go and sleep now. au revoir


every setback is a setup for a comeback.everytime you make a decision,you are making a change in your life.

chi xim jiok dui

sio yong ji bue LATTE guan zhui lu

ho ho lu ai wa zhe tam bok

an liam eh bi so lu be dong ji kuang kam gok

zha wu lang boi lu yong yan be hiao

kua tiok lu ga ee di wa bin jeng

zhen meng wa eh ai si kong kam

lu be tong wa eh hi chok qiu kui

si lu yong yan be bak gue eh ti eh

wui lu hu chut hi kuang xiong xim lu yong yan be liao gai

wa you ho ko ming chiang ka ki ai lu eh ji que

lu you hen hen bek teh wa eh hwong bei

kin kin kam meng lai am xng wa eh bak sai

meng zai ai lu li kui ee eh seh kai bo ko leng

wo gok gong gong dang gao qi gi chut hien eh hi ji jit

gao ga hi ji jit lu eh huat hien

jin jin ail u eh lang ka ki kua kin xiong bei


eh bak wa sio gong wa ga ki eh hou hui

beh sio ai ga gue tao chi xim jiok dui

wui lu ga lao eh tao ji leh bak sai

wui lu zho zhen he gai bi

eh wua be deng lu dui wa eh zhiong jue

wui lu hu chut hi kuang xiong xim lu yong yan be liao gai

wa you ho ko ming chiang ka ki ai lu eh ji que

lu you hen hen bek teh wa eh hwong bei

kin kin kam meng lai am xng wa eh bak sai

meng zai ai lu li kui ee eh seh kai bo ko leng

wo gok gong gong dang gao qi gi chut hien eh hi ji jit

gao ga hi ji jit lu eh huat hien

jin jin ail u eh lang ka ki kua kin xiong bei


this song is in chinese.痴心绝对.but I changed it into hokkien lyrics.i wonder if you understand what im writing.coz part of it is my current feeling towards you.the rest of it cant be explained in words.it has to be done.

Harry came up with this idea.

Sunday 18 November 2007

went to yan palace for dim sum just now.went to outram park for a walk then to vivo city.hardly walked.ended up in Häagen-Dazs.i need more.donuts too.nothing much today.i should be relaxing myself but somehow i just feel like theres something missing in my life.and i dont know whats it.aarrghh.got to rush my assignments.dont want to end up like last sem,rushing for this and that at the very last minute.

sorry charlene coz i wont be able to make it for breakfast tomorrow morning.gotta accompany my grandparents.going back to kl tomorrow night.feeling both sad and happy at the same time.sigh.duno how to explain either.

went to xin wang at cineleisure with jieying.the food was nice.pass her the donuts and the kite runner for her to read.enjoyed her company too.and we took pictures with the enormous christmas tree inside takashimaya.went book hunting i kinokuniya but couldnt find any thats nice.prolly its because i have a bad taste for books.


went back earlier as i had to get back to my grandparents.went to rama thai for dinner.shark fins.but its not as nice as the ones in thai village.grandpa loves shark fins.so i had to accompany him.other than the shark fins,the food was nice.


this week is going to be a pretty tough week for me.ive got english group presentation on tue and im going back on tue morning.somemore we never even practiced.have to prepare a proposal for my robotics assignment.do another research for robotics too.have to come up with an idea of how to build a mock cockpit.and have to test the connection of all 5 laptops linked together for prodex.the exibitions in dec and ive got less than a month to finish the cockpit and the connection and get everything moving.mid term test is coming.crap.


feel like going down to east coast park and have a walk alone.need the solitude of the beach badly.sigh.


is putting high hopes of being together with a person stubborn?especially when you know that its not going to happen?if it is then im stubborn am i not?



your happiness is my goal.i will still like you even if you wont like me back,thats alright for me.

Saturday 17 November 2007

trip to singapore b train was killing.there was no scenery.my laptops battery was limited.i couldnt sleep well either.the train was rocking like a boat and my arrival was delayed for more than hour.talk about efficiency.i was pretty hungry too.ate only 3 dunkin donuts as i had no more malaysian ringgit left.aunt brought me to east coast park and tried the satay bee hoon.not bad.and chicken wings.nice la.i think i devoured the food like a wolf.shame.

cant even com out with ideas on how to design a mock cockpit which we promised mr julian to help him.but it turns out to be quite challenging as i dont know how to design one.and yes i am bad in designing.i need inspirations.

grandparents will be arriving tomorrow.so will my mum and my kolo mee too.woho.who wants some?come and get it.

the kite runner by khaled hosseini is damn nice.touching.everyone should read it.you will not regret reading it.you can borrow it from me.but i will be passing to jie ying tomorrow.so wait if you want to borrow.or just buy it.its 35 ringgit only.

will be meeting up with stupid jie ying tomorrow.have to sleep now. au revoir.

for you,a thousand times over.

Tuesday 13 November 2007

sometimes setting a goal that is too high for yourself isnt good at all as you will end up licking the wounds.english presentation today suck big time.even though it wasnt that bad butthe outcome wasnt what i had expected.im starting to doubt myself in all sorts of stuff.wondering if i really had the ability to do things the right way.

it is often said that after every storm emerges a rainbow.but this storm is like a neverending one.crap.havent been studying for like a week.even in class,im physically there,but mentally im not.i tend to drift to another world.or just sit there daydreaming.lecturers are worried about me as im always very active and help them alot.im being frank and not flattering myself.

my english is like forever deteriorating.when i read other peoples blog.i feel like my writing is like only pre-school?crap.

i think im sick again.after not being sick for so long.no more windmill donuts from dunkin donuts.prolly its too oily as they deep-fry the whole thing.but its so nice.i will get more when im fine. =P jie ying.dont be jealous.coz theres no dd or j co in sg.so you cant do anything to satisfy your craving.theres like two dd in my area.all i have to do is just take a bus down.

food prolly can repel stress.but its only for a short time and im getting fatter.gonna become pooh bear if i continue like this.OMG.

going to get my tickets to sg tomorrow.im leaving on fri night.mom says im gonna freeze to death.coz the last time my bro went by train.he was cold like hell even though he had his jacket and 3 clothes.i cant imagine what will i become.ive only got a long sleeve chelsea training jersey and that wont do much.maybe i can start a fire in the train to keep me warm.lame.wonder what will my cabinmate look like.haha.hope they have adapters in the train.if not i will die of boredom.

gonna finish reading the kite runner.its so damn nice.and its touching.OMG.

Friday 9 November 2007

theres so many things that i wish i could just forget about it and act as if none of them ever occur in the first place.i doubt that you even know that ure still in my mind.tattooed deep into my skin.and whenever i look upon the scar,i see you face.everytime when it comes so close for me to date a girl,the image of you and the thoughts come rushing up my brain.making me stop the very next step.and this isnt the first time.why is this happening?i tried forgetting you but saying is always easier than done.what do i really have to do to have you or at least forget you and move on?can someone give me a decent answer?i doubt no one can.not even you.if there is really a chance to be will you,i will try my best and salvage the very chance.if theres really one.friends laugh at me,for being so foolish and stubborn.being in an unrequited love.but deep inside theres still lots of stuff that none of them know.prolly not even you.ive tried proving that im still into you but i duno if you got them right.im really tired of this crap.can you at least give me a clear answer?is there any hope or chance left for salvation?tell me there is.i really wish that i still had the courage like i used to.to stand up again.but i dont have and i dont even think i could get it bad so quickly.its buried deep inside the gravel where there is no hope.

maybe its because im too afraid to fail again.maybe its because my heart hardened after all the things the happened in the recent years.fearing that things will only worsen instead of the other way round.and if the worst scenarios happen,we might not even be friends anymore,for the fear for hurting each other.or maybe its best we remain at the current state and move no further along the path.

sometimes,i lie on the bed for hours thinking about my life and whats really behind all these.but most of the times i just end up with the answer sheet empty.i dont really understand what ive done wrong.my girl friends say maybe its because im too good with almost everyone especially girls.and thats why they treat me as a brother.is treating everyone kind a sin too?is it really bad to be too good or too kind to everyone?do i really have to be selfish?

the reason i changed so much when i came to kl for my diploma was you.i changed alot.and i dare swear that my lifestyle here is totally different compared to kuching and i am more hardworking than before.prolly a hundred times more.i used to be a very rebellious kid.but right now,im different.the old me is gone now.this is the new me.all because of you.

if its not for you,i dont think i will be this hardworking.i doubt that i will be here blogging and study till midnight and sometimes till dawn.im really grateful of you being the catalyst.hoping that some of my determination will prove to everyone that they are wrong for saying that this isnt an unrequited one.

Thursday 8 November 2007

went to pavilion again with jessey and her friend and her friends boy.jessey wanted to go there coz she says shes never been to there and ive been there for like the 4th time.nothing much happened but im quite happy today coz i helped a blind out of the toilet in kl sentral. =)



i fell asleep in the train while on the way back and i nearly missed my station.haha.crap.mum called me just now and said that maybe i should go down to sg when dey are going there coz grandpa isnt as strong as before and there wasnt anyone to push him around coz my lil bro will be pushing my grandma.and talk about my cousins who are self-centered so such job wouldnt be done by them.but im broke di.hahah.



someone help me with trigonometry pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee......

Wednesday 7 November 2007

math is killing me.i hate trigonometry.OMG.damn hard.aarrrgghhh.and i skipped french today.i wasnt feeling well.damn.i think im gonna be sick.slept whole afternoon.from 3 until 7. sigh.

watched the magic gourd at luns house.laughed the hell out of me.haha.damn nice and meaningful too.everyone should watch it.

went to gym this morning with pengyang.and he agreed to accompany me to get my hand tattooed with henna.haha.its only 10 bucks.but we will do it prolly after our presentation.coz ms tan will sure skin us alive if we were to present with our hands with henna.hahah.

dad called me just now and he says he will be in town for a day.hes coming on the 24th of nov for a transit to macau on the 25th.and he will back again on the 28th i tink.hahah.look forward to see him.


i read this news from the web saying that airasia will be bigger than singapore airlines and cathay pacific.OMG http://peanuts.aero/low_cost_airline_news/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1337&Itemid=59 go read it.

i read a quote in star the previous day.GLAMOUR-its about how you year,not what you wear.

Tuesday 6 November 2007

quite happy now.went to meet up with nat just now.no change at all. =P had dinner with her parents at esquire kitchen.yummy.and went to pavilion after that.2nd time in 2 days.haha.i think i can walk the place with my eyes blindfolded.haha.food republic just opened today.OMG.gotta try it.the food in sg is nice but i duno whether its the same here.crystal jade restaurant is also in kl now.nice.but im broke.hahah.went to buy donuts from J Co. Donuts.heard of it before???? www.jcodonuts.com damn freaking nice.nats mum gave me 2.thx aunty and uncle. =)

and and english teachers not coming tomorrow.MC.ahha so that means that my presentation is being prosponed.hahahhaha niceee.lalalala

gonna sleep earlier.going gym tomorrow.haha.I NEED DONUTS....

Monday 5 November 2007

my mind is currently filled with both sad and happy.im sad because my friends in kuching just attended their graduation prom which i couldnt attend even if i could fly back.because its only for those who graduated and sadly i walk out of the school in april.im sad to because ive got a presentation on tuesday and its still in a mess and i wont have time tomorrow because nat will be in town so im going down to meet her.damn.gotta do it.most of all.im damn pissed because a bloody bitch kept pushing me when the train reached the station and the door just open.she kept pushing me as it the doors gonna close at any moment and the trains gonna fall.its as if that if she stays in the train for another 10 secs,she might die.idiot.self centered.lucky during that time i was in good mood or else i will just keep blocking her way and not let her get out until the door closes.

anyway.went out with randy and eng tseng.eng tsengs sis offered to give us a ride to times square.thx.and we walked from 1.30 until 10.30 OMG.9 hours.haha.went to collect my router and went to quite few places.went to topshop and got myself a shirt.just a normal one.bought few lemons from cold storage and we spent another half an hour inside just to get 3 canned drinks.shit.and i saw something interesting.a bottled FRAPPUCINO from starbucks.shit.i will upload the pic tomorrow.i was like wth.haha.i mean its so wierd la. -_- and after that we went into starhill gallery for a walk and none of us bought anything as the things inside are like bloody expensive.DKNY ROLEX LV KENZO DAVIDOFF BOSS BANG & OLUFSEN VERTU and so on.and jackie chan has a coffee shop inside.haha.we went to pavilion later with lun.he met up with us and he brought strawberries.yummy.theres still some shops thats still under construction.we went into mercato.its a supermarket but its damn classy.even cold storage cant compete with it.damn classy.and the prices are the same.

J Co. donuts is in KL.shit woi.and theres like so many ppl queuing up to buy.i wanted to buy but my friends were lazy to wait.at least 30 mins.super long queue.gotta ty all the flavours.hahahha.no more dunkin donuts.J CO.

food republic is coming.their lot is still under construction.nice.i will go to pavilion again.soon.i swear.im into one of the new swatch irony watches.i want them.gotta start saving money.

Sunday 4 November 2007

i want to go to the graduation prom.sigh.im pissed.because of the last minute goal by william gallas.arrghhh.lalalalala.

im still not done with my preparation for my presentation on tuesday.must get it done by tomorrow.but im so lazy to do it.sigh.

nat seems to be having a hard time recently and im sorry that im not by your side comforting you as we are in separate places.but anyways shes coming over on mon.and hopefully i have time to accompany her.haha.really miss her a lot.as friends.haha.

on the other hand,charlene seems to be on cloud nine.dont know when will she be coming down.haha.her mood seems to be improving quickly.good work girl.keep it up.jia you.

addicted to another book written by khaled hosseini-the kite runner.im only lke one third through the book and its very touching indeed.no wonder its a bestseller.haha.and its sad too.

just got one of olivia ongs album.a girl meets bossa nova 2.been finding for a long time.i can assure you its nice.

an unrequited love is always a bitter one.try it if you dont believe so.

we are just two different people living in two different world
with two different life and two different propects.

Saturday 3 November 2007

lun went back to cameron highlands just now and hes gonna buy me strawberries.fresh ones.haha.nice.ive just realised that ive been cabbing alot recently.duno why.hahah even from my place to the train station which is quite near and i used to walk there.but now i prefer to take a cab.shit -_____- havent been revision recently.even if i did,its only abit.ive got an english presentation on tues and i still haven prepare it.i dont even have the script yet.damn.haven iron my clothes too.gotta get everything done by tomorrow night.

had a chat with PRETTY GIRL,debbie ho last night.haha.talk about lots and lots of stuff and she says shes coming over to kl at the beginning of dec.haha.shes coming with yan chang.haha.they are staying at tegans place which is very far from my place.and i just realised that tegans studying in kl too.haha.theres so many people studying in kl and i never even realise so.lame.

i really feel like going down to sg now.ahha dont ask why.i duno too.just feel like going.haha hope my mum will ask me to go down when they are going over there.

nat.cheer up =) being emo isnt good.you arent that week dear.stay strong.dont be so pressimistic and everything will be alright.its normal if friends dint ask you to go out.maybe they really forgot.they might be some other reasons which we might not know.its very normal.dont take minor matters like that as if its very serious.being sad will just make your day dull and meaningless.everything happens for a reason.so why dont you take things the way it is?maybe life will be easier for you =) cheer up.hols are mend for relaxing not for crying.when are you coming to KL??haha

Thursday 1 November 2007

went out with johnson yesterday.its was quite fun.had to go into aquaria with them.and igot a cheaper price coz im a student.haha.i pai only 20 but they paid 28 each.after that we went to taman paramount to meet pui li.a friend of his.his ex-crush too.hahah but she was nice as she offered to send us to sunway phase 2.and we walked around and spent 13 bucks on a plate of stupid rice.with curry.yucks.after that she too decided to send u to petaling street as johnson wanted to go there and get a pair of cheap shoes.but we decided not to let her drive us there coz its really far from subang and theres a very high chance of her getting lost.haha her driving skills -_- so in the end she drove us to the train station and we took a train there.

its good to be seeing old friends and i sure miss him alot.as friends la.harry will be coming soon i hope.his words cant always be trusted.haha

jessey called me up last night and we hate a chat for like over an hour.haha.she said shes afraid of failing her test and so on.jia you girl.dont give up =) you chose this path so its up to you to finish the unpaved road.so start paving the road for you own future.take care.

i wamt the new versace perfume for men.its so nice.but im so broke now.should i do it the evil way?use my card to satisfy myself and get skinned later??hahah or should i save money and get it myself???

lifes more than just doing this or that to show or prove to other people youre good.its about being yourself and enjoying every single bit of it.

Wednesday 31 October 2007

french is hard.i keep getting it mixed with english.haha.gonna study really hard.

my friends often say they admire me for being so joyful and cheerful most of the time.well.let me tell you guys.im the really the type of person that shows his real emotions out.i think its really pointless to be moody or even show sour faces in front of people that has nothing to do with the problem youre having.so i may be smiling all the time.but deep inside,i doubt you understand what im really feeling or thinking.not even my besties can understand me well.so if youre just a normal friend of mine,dont even think that you understand me.coz youre not even close to it.smiling all the time especially in front of strangers will give them a good impression of yourself.not only that,smiling can brighten a persons day,especially a sad or a moody one.so why dont you smile everyday,when you can make a persons day better?

dear nat said my english is good =) thank you.thats nice of you.but your english is good too.and she has started BLOGGING too.oh no~~~~but i dont think she wants to reveal her site to the public yet.hhahaah jia you.

will be playing in the futsal competition later.dint really wanted to take part but adam called me and he managed to persuade me into it.so hope gods on my side.if we cant win th tournament,at least we win some matches. =)

i really need you by my side.badly.

Tuesday 30 October 2007

meet up with johnson at mid valley just now.glad to be seeing him again.he hasnt change much.had dinner at yoshinoya.its quite nice.kai tings going to sg on nov and johnsons going on aug next year.hmm...seems like everyones going over to sg to study.haha



hmm...gotta sleep earlier coz i dont want to fall asleep in class again like just now.and i will be having my first french class.very excited and nervous at the same time.haha

Monday 29 October 2007

lifes back on track now and ive been trying hard to improve everything.my studies my lifestyle and lots more.after so many things happen in the past years,ive managed to reminisce most of it and learn from them so that i can be a better person and wont let the very same mistakes happen again.there are quite a few items which i want badly but im currently quite broke.esp after buying my shoes.haha.so im trying hard to save money and hopefully by next year i can get a new swatch irony.but before that i think i will get a notebook cooler first and then a pair of good speakers,hopefully harman/kardon if i can find it here or if not altec lansing.

just now,we went to jusco near the lrt station and we passed by starbucks which was inside jusco.man i really feel like buying a drink there.but i dont really like to drink alone unless when im sad.but who can i go with??most of my friends dont like to patronise places like that.i really wish there was someone who could accompany me.

johnsons coming over tomorrow.haha.will be going over to meet him at mid valley after my classes end.so it will be around 6pm.hopefully i can get there by 7.haha.shit ive got lecture at 8am tomorrow and im still blogging here.oh no....

Thursday 25 October 2007

there isnt much classes this week.i dont know why but it seems like the lecturers and tutors are being somehow struck by some plague.alot with mc.others meeting.as a result,we only go to school for like 1 or 2 hours a day.pathetic isnt it.but when they replace the class,it will be crap.i dont even bother to imagine about it.since there was only one class just now,i decided to go to the gym for a workout.but peng yang invited me for volleyball so i accepted it.there were quite a number of chicks in the gym but unfortunately,i wasnt into any of them because all of them are short-haired.haha i prefer long hair chicks XD walked back with vicknesvaran after the workout as hes staying near my house.and he told me that im thinner now haha.and he also told me a very disturbing fact.he said last years BASIC ELECTRONIC & MICROPROCESSORS passing rate was less than 30% of all 3 courses.mechatronics,electronics and telecommunication.will i have to fail again???oh no...im so worried now.

im quite happy that all my friends from my ex-class graduate.i was quite surprised when olivia told me that.i mean edmonds result was like shit.mine was better than him la.that means i can graduate too?hahah harry graduate too.glad to hear that.congrats!!!

physics is like so hard....i cant even do the past year questions which miss bong asked us to pass it up as an assignment.hmm maybe its because we havent even learn about it yet.how foolish of me.

meanwhile,johnson told me that hes coming over on monday with his girfriend,kai ting and his girlfriends brother and sister.hmm.its will be ncie to be seeing them again =) cant wait.


Wednesday 24 October 2007

should i push myself more than before??or should i not and just let things be??i need guidance.someone please give me a decent answer.

Monday 22 October 2007

charlene gave me a link to a blog that belongs to her senior and its a really touching blog.its the best blog ive read.its really different from alot of blogs.i salute to her courage.she dared to stand up and offer her seat to a mid-aged man standing in from of her in a MRT.how about you??frankly,i would have thought the same way but i doubt that i will have the courage to do so.after reading her blog,it really inspired me alot.and i hope that it will do the same thing to you guys.

anyway,just now a friend of mine cried after reading my blog.i was surprised when the person told me about it.the person said she couldnt believed that i became so weak and wasnt able to handle the fact that i did pretty bad for my exams.to you guys,this may seem to be a tiny matter,but to me its really a severe blow.it felt like ive lost everything.but anyway,now im fine after so many peoples comforting.so you guys dont have to worry anymore aite. =) im fine.

but theres still one thing that isnt fine.i want to go for a movie......its four months since i last went into a cinema.aaargghhhhhhhhhhh....i want to watch THE MAGIC GOURD.seems nice.

Sunday 21 October 2007

after thinking for the whole night last night,ive decided to try my best again this time.and i will 10 times more hardworking than before so that i will not let my parents down this time.i feel better after talking my mum.she said it was ok as long as i tried my best.ive chosen this course myself so i am to bear all the burden alone.people often say mechatronics is a very hard course and i believed none of them.but now i too think its a hard course but i chose it myself.the consequences of studying mechatronics is that no slacking is allowed.and i did slack everyonce in awhile last semester.and maybe thats why i failed 2 subjects.and prolly most of the people are sleeping now or are having fun and im still awake studying...and i had to quit all my games too so that i wont be addicted to any of them.and if im addicted,i will fail everything and thats the end for me.and i dont want that to happen to me either.

thanks a million to my friends who stood by me and gave me mental support when i was down
esp jie ying for comforting me through msn,kuiyin for calling me for awhile,charlene for her constant support and talking to me and connie for talking to me for an hour.i owe you guys alot.

thank you mum for giving me another chance. =)

Friday 19 October 2007

just checked my results online and this is the first time i feel so bad about it and to be honest.i cried.mum called me up and told me it was okay.but i feel like im a failure.how could i fail 2 subjects.and i only got a fucking B for nation building.ENGLISH an A- only....my physics and computer studies C...fuck....i hate myself....decided to skip all classes as all are lectures.and rethink my life.should i continue studying??when i cant even do well in the first semester.sigh.fucking down and sad now...sigh...wished i could talk to someoone now...i cant beelieve these are my results.


AELE1023
ENGLISH LANGUAGE A-


AEMS2022
HUBUNGAN ETNIK(NATION BUILDING) B


ATGE1013
MATHEMATICS I F


ATGE1043
ENGINEERING SCIENCE I C+

ATGE1063
COMPUTER STUDIES C

ATGE1124
ENGINEERING DRAWING & COMPUTER-AIDED DESIGN AND DRAFTING A-


ATGE1323
PRINCIPLES OF ELECTRICAL AND ELECTRONIC ENGINEERING F


ASCG1001
FOOTBALL (LEVEL 1) S


ASCG2001
FOOTBALL (LEVEL 2) S

Thursday 18 October 2007

went to klcc alone coz i decided to have sometime alone.i wanted to get the book that charlene reco to me but it was out of stock so i went down borders in times square and its out of stock too...i end up buying THE JOY OF LIVING and ive just started reading.its quite nice.anyway...have a talk with a friend of mine,im not going to mention the name.and the person cheered me up alot and it feels nice to be hearing a familiar voice.mum called me just now and i told her how i felt about my results and she said its okay as long as i did my best =) she agreed to let me learn french too.but i ll be quite sad if i dont do well because she will definitely be disappointed with me even though she reassured me that its ok.but i promise that i will be more hardworking this semester.hope everythings gonna be fine.im tired of being like this.being sad and lonely all the time.sigh

Wednesday 17 October 2007

had a meeting this morning.we were asked to choose a post and i chose to be in charge of factory visiting and if i dont get the post,at least give me a post that does not involve with money because im tired of being a treasurer.all these money stuff is killing me and having to ask money from a friend can sometimes ruin friendship.sigh.

going to enrol for the fench class tomorrow but dont know if they will be conducting it this semester as im the only person who is applying for it.my previous sem results are coming out on friday and i doubt that i will do well even though i studied quite hard.prolly because i dint study hard enough or is it that im stupid??

decided to go out with wee leong and hang ot at pavilion mall as staying at home will only make me end up feeling sad.pavilion is huge but there are still quite some stores that are still under renovation.but its nice.

charlene recommended a book to me Battlefield Of The Mind.hmm ive decided to buy it since i think that this book might help me.

back to studying.am i being kiasu??sigh...i dont wana get bad results again.....sigh...

Tuesday 16 October 2007

charlene showed me tis funny clip about teletubbies and it cheered me up a little.thx



kuiyin...thx for your comment and thanks for cheering me up.hugss** i owe you one =)

Monday 15 October 2007

Last night after chatting with charlene through msn,I told her that I was heading to bed but I couldnt sleep so I lied on the bed for nearly 2 hours reminiscing my past and trying to think what went wrong in my life.but im still thinking now.i couldnt think of the reason everything went in the opposite direction,if this is an endurance test,I give up.i lose.i cant stand any much longer.im going mad.


 

I really feel like im a disgrace to my family.ive wasted a lot of money and yet I dint even proved myself worthy of it.when I was 6,I had an operation for both of my eyes.biletral squint.it cost over 10k dollars and during my 9 years of wearing specs,I think ive used over 100 pairs of them as I used to ruin it when I was in a bad mood.my specs werent cheap either.most of them were around 2++ as it has to be custom made to fit me and the lenses werent the usual because im not short-sighted either.when I was 15,the doctor said I dont have to wear spectacles already as my eyesight was normal and better than a lot of ppl.i thought this was the end of the money spending spell.but after I took off my glasses everything went another way.i started going out with my friends almost every weekend spending lots of money everytime we went out.sigh.i even lost 2 handphones within half a year.great right??together both phones totaled 4k.im a great spender right.


 

last year I broke my right collar bone during a football match and the operation was nearly 6k.even though it was paid by the insurance company,my parents still had to pay 10% of it.during may when I went to kl for my diploma studies,my dad bought a laptop for me which was 4k.i wanted to study in sg as I will be staying with my aunt and that will reduce the cost for everything,even the tuition fees but I played and dint really study hard to my SPM so I couldnt get what I wanted for my studies.every month I spend over 1k alone.allowance,stay and phone bills.


 

i went all the way down to sg by bus and I spend nearly 700 ringgit for 6 days.sigh.great right.next year I have to do the operation on my shoulder again to remove the steel support and I dont know if the insurance companys paying it.but I dont want to do the operation because I dont to waste my parents money and I dont want to experience the same thing all over again.lying on the bed for 3 weeks doing nothing.but the doctor says I have to.sigh.


 

Theres nothing good about me.i still cant find any part of me thats good.i cant always play well in football.it depends on my mood.sigh.if im sad I play like crap.for studies,I studied so damn freaking hard for my exams this sem but I doubt that my results will be good.sigh.ive really lost my hope and determination.i thought I could do really well but when the lecturer told us about the bad news,I was shocked.i thought this time I would not disappoint my parents but maybe im wrong again.someone please save me from all this mess.can I swap life??sunder with someone.


 

why do I have to experience all this?why cant I just be a normal kid??and ordinary person??just like my other friends??live an ordinary life,have a nice good and kind girlfriend or boyfriend by their side comforting them when they are sad?sigh.who can I turn to when im really sad??like now?in the bus?maybe its because I contributed 0 in love and that I suck in it?i mean in terms of expressing it?or maybe its that im too naïve??everytime I thought its gonna end up well but im always wrong.it always backfires.sigh.should I give up??i think so.


 

or maybe its that im not complacent with my hectic life??am I thinking too much??or is it a reality??i need answers to all this crap.what have I done in the past to deserve all this?or is it that I dont practice enough random kindness?why do I bother writing so much,no one reads it anyway.life often sucks.

Sunday 14 October 2007

tonights my last night in sg.going back to kl tomorrow at 12 noon.i dont want to go back.sigh.i want to stay here.i dont feel like going back to school.sobs...

went out with ms. sia today.the sweet lady drag me to do a free eye check up.she was supposed to do it.but it ended up with both of us doing the check up.my eyes are near perfect ^_^ and i dont need specs.can you believe it?

we went to starbucks and this time she bought me a drink.thanks girl.went to adidas originals and bought a pair of porsche design originals.was quite reluctant to buy it because it was abit too exp but she supported me so in the end i bought it.been dying to get one of those.





i hate JIE YING....haha shes so EVIL and MEAN....i thought to being a good samaritan.i introduced her a place that sells nice kolo mee but i ended up being scolded...sigh...stupid girl..i think a drink for the wrong girl -_-

results will be coming out on the 19th.dont think my results will be good.maybe its because i dint try hard enough.sigh.got to do harder next sem.cant afford to let my parents down again.sigh...

ps:charlene.thanks for going out with me this afternoon.its really good to be seeing you again.but you looked pale this time.you have to eat more.thanks for the drink and for your support when i was reluctant to get that pair of shoes.thanks again for accompanying me back to kembangan.i think its the first time we go out together right??i mean just the 2 of us.haha and its the first time we took mrt together.haha.she slapped me....hahhah when i told her that i was sleepy =.= haha.heys...everythings gonna be fine aite...cheer up.if theres anything that you need my help just tell me aite...cheerssssss

Friday 12 October 2007

in sg now...wed was my worse experience in woodlands,singapore...the customs....pathetic....hold me off for nth....cant i bring a fucking laptop into sg for personal use??idiot....do i dress like a poor guy wanting to sell off his laptop??i never knew the prices for laptops in malaysia are cheaper than sg...pathetic...made me waste 18 sing dollars to take a freaking cab back coz i missed my stupid bus...coz i wasted 20 mins in the stupid customs office....ive been to SG for N times and this is my worse experience....sigh summore its a chinese who held me off...can you believe that???

met up with jie ying yesterday afternoon.haha its nice seeing her again.her faces rounder now and i tink she looks nicer with it...she brought me around and we went to plaza singapura,suntec city,marina square,esplanade and went for a drink at the coffee connoisseur.not bad is all ive got to comment.took a mrt to kembangan and my aunt fetched me back to her house.jie ying sez i slimmed down... *blush* hahah

charlene,cheer up aite...be happy...look at the bright side.like barney.hahah everythings gonna be fine...

jie ying....hhaha ang mos are handsome rite??hahhah

Monday 8 October 2007

a new sem,a new start.i will ry and do harder than my previous sem.

Sunday 7 October 2007

had a great night just now.went out with frens:harry,johnson,sam,kui yin,natalie and charlene.went to starbucks.there isnt any word in the dictionary that could possibly describe my feelings tonight.feeling both sad and happy at the same time.how ironic it is.im sad coz this might be the only chance that we could get together and chat like this.im happy coz we were able to make it just now even though i paid for most of the drinks except for sams and kui yins.i paid half for harrys and johnsons.but i tink its worth it.

i dont feel like going back to kl.i will surely miss every one of you here.i really wish i could turn back time or at least stop the time from moving.lifes hard but i made this decision of leaving kuching and continue my studies in kl.this is what ive to suffer.my heart is so heavy now.wished someone could help me carry it.sigh. T.T this is the first time i felt like that.to be frank,i really feel like crying. =(

guys thx for being with me tonight.i owe you guys a big one.this might be our last gathering i think as everyone of you will be taking your very own path.may god bless every one of you.good luck in your test.

kui yin....i dont know if we could meet again before you leave for aus,so good luck and god bless you.i feel really lucky to have you as a friend and as a scout sister.once a scout,always a scout.never give up on scout yea.no matter what you do,i will always support you ^_^ if you face any trouble,you can always find me.whenever i tink of the happy times we used to have during scout and when we go out,i feel very happy.i tink you feel the same way too right?

connie.....sorryyyy for the late reply... =( i will try to make it up to you next time yea ^_^

charleneeee.....hhaha thx for being able to make it tonight.when i go sg,starbucks again yes???take k and god bless you =)

Thursday 4 October 2007

its been a long long time since i last wrote something here...will be writing again when i go back KL.just got my new credit card =) will have to control my expenses =X

i dont know when will my results come out...so nervous...dont know if i do well....

i made a bet with char few days ago.if she can pass her driving test without failing,i will get her something nice.but i dont think she will be able to make it coz i will pray really hard that she fails.but i too will pray that she passes it.its ironic isnt it?

PS:Charlene,sorry if we cant make it to the starbucks in kuching,but i will try my best to make it up to you when i go down to sg =) u better be free when im there =Þ it seems that your mood is getting better and better in kuching.haha keep it up =)

Saturday 29 September 2007

sigh...........im so tired and troubled.....but who to pour out to??lifes hard....have to wait for this and that...im tired of waiting...aarghhhhhhh....................

Monday 24 September 2007

All of a sudden,after reaching home....i felt very stressed up...shit....i duno how to say nor do i know how to explain.....arghhhh!!!!

fgsjidfk gjsdf;jwop ert wopeitpwier[terocfipro[wecer[jf[pdjsk]a jweop[jrk w al
sgfwepok pjtowertwerotjkerojwco[;rsig[[tjihpertgksl;gsdf,lsdl'fm,gwe[rtkopwtgsdfpgjk[psjkg[psdgl;skgl;skg]we][rtkweg]psdg
sdlglwe[tgkpwe]df
gs
dfgweptgwel[twe]o[tkwer][gklpwe][\lpgsdf]
sg[
flg]
sdlpg]
welgwerkptgwetger]pg][erfglsdgp;sdf'
g,ldf[gk,opek,rwp
gwre \

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.........shit....wads wrong with me..... =(

Wednesday 19 September 2007

its only the 3rd day in kuching and im bored to death...ive got no freaking car to drive coz its still in the hospital waiting for the stupid insurance company.i want to go starbucksssss.....we shall go together dont worry. =)

my flight was cool.there was a heavy downpour in kuching and due to the turbulence,my plane was like a roller coaster going up and down up and down.there was a point when the plane dropped like 10-20 feet and everyones face is so tensed and im smiling >.< quite exciting though.

im need football and kolo mee....hahah went to apply for a mastercard this morning with my parents.hope i can use it before i go back KL =)

Monday 17 September 2007

am i the last one to say exams are over???hahahha anyway...off i go~~~~~

Sunday 16 September 2007

one more day and one more subject left.i have to score really good for this one.electronic and electrical circuit.going home soon.yay.cant wait.done 50% of my packing only >.<>.<

i want a henna(or a mehndi) on my right hand.looks cool.hmm...where can i get one??anyone knows where???
eager to see you again.and have starbucks together.thats a promise to you~~~ =)

Saturday 15 September 2007

todays computer studies was crap.sigh...tired of this pathetic life.ppl always say thrs always a rainbow after a storm.but i cant find my rainbow.or is it that im still in this never ending storm??sigh.im tired of holding on.i feel like giving up my exams.i want to go home now....eat and sleep....care nothing about studies.duno cant do well or not.nothing really works out for me =(

gonna sleep on my books.osmosis.charlene says that way i will have more confidence so i shall try it.

Wednesday 12 September 2007

just now while i was studying engineering science,a friend of mine,yong seng suddenly came up with two lame and pathetic jokes.

I) a bird was standing on top of the a sharp object.then suddenly she laid an egg.but why dint the egg break???

II)why did dinosaurs become extinct??


















I)because she wore an underwear so the egg was inside the underwear

II)because ultraman每天杀一只,杀就后就绝种。。。

Tuesday 11 September 2007

todays english wasnt that hard.ive overestimated it.should be able to get an A =) when to shah alam to replace my V letter.its not uner warranty so i had to pay for it.now my keyboard looks perfect.will be having engineering science on wed after.hope the standard is not so high.4 more to go.im going home soon.

im not the last one to know that Osama bin Laden is a billionaire right??and he sponsored the taliban all by himself.i never knew he was so popular in the islamic world especially in sudan.i feel so naive =(

gonna study awhile and head to bed.i need starbucksssssss!!!!!!!

charlene thanks for your exam luck.proved to be quite useful :P

Sunday 9 September 2007

yesterdays nation building paper wasnt that bad.should be able to get an A or at least a B.tomorrow is english language which i should be able to get an A.just recovered partially from my migraine.but still it hurts abit T.T i wana go home now....cant wait.might be sending my laptop to the workshop tomorrow.to replace the stupid V button which i accidentally broke it >.< clumsy me.anyway.back to studying computer studies.hope god will be with me throughout the exam.i need him badly as i have very little confidence left.

hope miracles happen.

Charlene you can get through it.i believe so.cheer up,everything will be fine.you can do it.

Saturday 8 September 2007

later at 9am,it shall be my first college exam.NATION BUILDING.i dont know if i can do well but i shall try my best not to let my parents and you down. =) im having a mirgraine now at im in great anguish.i hope everything will be fine when i wake up later.god bless me.i shall put my best effort and answer all the questions =)

Thursday 6 September 2007

小鸟
Small Bird
lalaallalala...every morning when you wake up,just say small bird in chinese...and you will feel better...hahha it works with m =) xiao nia~~~

Wednesday 5 September 2007

just now i was studying nation building and i came across something about commonwealth citizen.and after checking it in wikipedia,i feel very lucky to be born in Malaysia.As Malaysia was one of the colonies under the british empire,this country is part of the commonwealth nations so every citizen here is a commonwealth citizen.there are so many privileges.eg we can go to UK without having to apply visas.cool and we can work in UK too.we dont need police permit while staying there and can stay there as long as you want.People from other countries staying there will need a police permit.and if we lose our passport in other countries and there is no malaysian embassy there,we can go to either UK embassy or other commonwealth countries' embassies and obtain a temporary travel document.cool....

now i feel lucky and proud to be a malaysian~~~

MALAYSIA TRULY ASIA~~~ =)

Monday 3 September 2007

4 more days till my exams and ive only done abit of revision??sat is nation building and i only learn 4 chapters out of 8? >.< damn anyway...theres a small minor problem yet to be solved.

can anyone tell me what can i do with these??all empty already.haha~~~

Sunday 2 September 2007

i think i have autophobia.coz i dread being alone and everytime when im alone i feel lonely and sad...sigh.what can i do...heaven knows...going out doesnt help either.coz i see couples holding hands and im holding my own hands...exams are so near and im still here blogging... =(

Friday 31 August 2007

HAPPY 50th BIRTHDAY to MALAYSIA
just came back.went to jusco just now.coz there was a midnight sale going on but it ends at 1am.and we went there at 12.45.so tired now.im going home soonnnn...17 more days.
back to study.the subject i dread most and prolly the hardest too.principles of electrical and electronic engineering. =(

Thursday 30 August 2007

to my own bro:cheer up.dont be too sad over what happened between you two.maybe shes not the right one for you aite.be happy and everything will be fine.im sure you will find a new one.way better than her =)

to denion:thx for always being there to support me in my studies.thanks a million for helping me in most of the assignments.without your help,i really cant imagine it.thx bro.

exams are coming real soon.just a blink and its in front of you.all the best to everyone.

to Mr. Ong "chicken little" Thai Kiat:thanks for being so lenient to our group.we are the only group you allow to redo for the 2nd time.thanks.will invite you for futsal.haha

to charlene:thank you for always being there to support me when im sad.in msn.haha and thx for having faith in me.just have a little faith.be more optimistic and you will see the world a better place.todays your last paper so jia you.all the best to you.you can do it.god bless you =)

Wednesday 29 August 2007

mum called me in the evening and told me that the police found my waja.8836 is back.nice.i should be able to drive it when im back in kuching. =) its a long long time since i last drove.

10 more days to go.

i might not do very well but i promise i shall do my best.i will have to be more hardworking.

hope to see you soon.very soon i guess. =)

Monday 27 August 2007

bought a malaysian football team jersey on saturday.with wee leong.MALAYSIA BOLEH!!! haha meanwhile.im once again addicted to kolo mee.even though its not as good as the ones in kuching.i will eat as many as i can when i get back.

i cant believe that my journal writing is worse than a person who speaks broken english.my god.i swear that the tutor isnt good in english.my frens paper is full of grammatical errors and he just looks through it as though everything is perfect.damn.and maybe he cant understand the english words i wrote in my paper.maybe its because the words are too difficult for him to understand.sigh.

i would like to introduce a book to everyone.

A WAY LONG GONE
by ISHMAEL BEAH

its about kids in Sierra Leone during the civil war.very touching.im still reading it.its RM70 and its available in TIMES bookstore.

have to start preparing for my exam.8th september,nation building.

meanwhile.dad just booked my ticket back to kuching.so ladies and gentlemen.listen up.on the 17th of september 8pm sharp.we shall meet in KUCHING INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT. =)

ISHALLCHANGEMYATTITUDE...

PS:charlene good luck in your exams and god bless you.you can do it.its not hard,its just a matter of yes and no =)

Saturday 25 August 2007

happy 18th birthday to dearest NATALIA LING

Friday 24 August 2007

KOLO MEE



KOLO MEE IS GOOD.WAY BETTER THAN INSTANT NOODLES OR ANY OTHER TYPE OF NOODLES IN THE WORLD.

PS:eman....looks deliious right??but you ant find it in australia.too bad.i can have it anytime i want. =P

Thursday 23 August 2007

thursday

yesterday was just another ordinary day for me.woke up late so i decided to skip english.hope today i might be able to wake up in time to go to the nation building lecture.exams are near.yesterdays autocad test was easy.if i can do all my drawings well then i might be able to get all 4 credit hours.nice.ate kolo mee on tuesday.was quite happy because its been a long long long long long time since i last devoured kolo mee.anyway nats birthday is near so hopefully i might not forget to wish her a happy birthday =)

my bro lost his car again.sigh.hopefully my mum will get a new car before i go back so that i will be able to drive.my exams will end on the 17th of sept and my flight is on the 27th.should i change my flight or that i go down to sg and stay with my aunt for a week?still deciding.

will something special happen between you and me?or will it be just like one of my fantasies.fading away slowly.losing both grip and sight.

Monday 20 August 2007

monday

todays not my day.why?coz we had to redo the drawing assignment again.sigh.how dumb cold i be?i dont even know how a hydraulic motor looks like?ivent finish my drawings.test is so near.everythings coming nearer and nearer.yet im not pepared.ive been trying to elate myself with happy things so that i can get motivated and start studying once more.but i cant.damn.someone shine light upon my path please.duno what to do now.

went out with jessie to meet some ss3a friends of my school.henry yap got 2nd for the competition.congrats.had great time too.onion my former math teacher was here with them.nice.

watched the U-19 champions youth cup in bukit jalil with wee leong,his bro and ah cheng.it was a great match between manchester united and juventus.but juventus had no chance of beating them.i admired no.4 brandy for his speed and no.2 lee for his passing and composure.they are good.

in less than 2 months i shall be back in kuching.cant wait.

Friday 17 August 2007

what a day

today my lecturer told us to write an essay DESCRIBE A FESTIVAL YOU TOOK PART IN and i realised that my english is deteriorating.i only managed to hang around 320-330 words.oh nooo.what has happened to me.most prolly is that i dun have time to spare for reading english books which i used to when i was in kuching.last time i was able to finish the 6th harry potter book in a 5 days.now the 7th one which was thinner than the previous one took me more than 2 weeks.im still reading.oh no.

today was just great for me.my coursemates lagoon me or they call it aluba here.its the 2nd time since i came here.noooo...it hurts..until now.it took about 8 guys to handle me. >.< and i could not fight back as one of my hand was holding an ice-cream.haha

im still trying to understand the electronic assignment.its so hard.nooo

everyone reading this is a sucker,especially youuuuuuu

losers...haha those who have finished watched the simpsons will know it...hahah

somethings wrong with me today.ive been hyper all day.and i duno why. >.<

Thursday 16 August 2007

16th august 2007,thursday

yesterday during my nation building tutorial class,miss chew my lecturer said that i could be a very good actor.haha coz she says i can do many actions and have lots of emotions.cool.actor...haha i shall consider it.

the last few days were so dramatic and i dread thinking of it for the fear of being unable to control my wrath once again.hope the coming days shall be bright and easy.

im so lazy to redo my project.can i pay other people to do it?im still considering whether to join the b. braun innovative project.i will have to take a patient analysis every two weeks and many other stuff.its half a year.dont know whether i should take part.

meanwhile,charlene said SECRET was nice.and she even shred her precious tears.is it really that touching?we shall see her taste.haha hope i might draw out some time this sat to watch it with you. :)

Monday 13 August 2007

pissed

the presentation today was awful.though my group manage to be the 2nd highest.but i could do better.i am the one to be blame since im the person doing the presentation.i dont know why i suddenly became nervous.i was never like that.its my worst presentation.i did it 3 times already and this is the 4th time.yet it was crap.sigh.

you fucking messaged me and said that i backstabbed you.what the hell.you contributed nothing for this whole presentation and you got marks.what more do you want.you left without telling us.and if i were to backstab you,you will get nothing for this presentation.sigh...

im starting to grow fonder of you as days go by :)

happy 18th birthday to Johnson and all the best to you.god bless you.

Sunday 12 August 2007

tired

hanged out with jia jun,jessie and iverson.dont even know who the hell is this iverson guy...jessies fren...wierdo ahah anyway...went to meet her at the ktm station.shes so dumb...haha i was stand behind her and she still msged me and asked where am i.went to sunway pyramid to meet up with jia jun as its his bday.went to CINELEISURE DAMANSARA for a movie.watched SIMPSONS.dude,the movie rocks.its my first movie since i turned 18.jessie kept hitting me as if im a sandbag.gonna get bruises.haha.but it was nice to be able to hang out with old friends.

have to do a presentation for engineering drawing.i shall be doing all the presentation.and im not fully prepared yet.

hope i shall be able to do well in my presentation.back to the preparation now... :)

Saturday 11 August 2007

Assignment

just finished the report for my ENGINEERING DRAWING assignment.shall do the presentation now.its been a dramatic day yesterday.i feel down twice while playing futsal and my head is still very dizzy.perhaps its a post-traumatic experience.and yet im still doing this crap.you guys are sleeping soundly in the room and im in the living room doing the assignment all alone.what do you think i am??superman??maybe.i really wish im one.

cut my left hand just now.how careless of me.but anyway its just a small cut.

shall be playing in a futsal tournament at 2pm later.i need sleep to rejuvenate my energy.kui yin will be coming over to KL today.she says she be arriving tonight.hope i can take out some precious time of mine to go and find her.

im addicted to ECLIPSE.ive got 10 empty cans in my house now and im finishing the 11th can.its my stress reduction pill.


this is an endurance test for me and i shall accomplish it.no matter what :)

Tuesday 7 August 2007

TUESDAY,07 AUGUST 2007

hammered my hand at the workshop today....careless me....but its just a small blister...in case you guys are wondering what the heck am i doing,im suppose to make a hole through a 4mm thick iron with a chisel and a hammer...but...im the first one to finish it and my iron is the only piece that isnt out of shape...everyones iron has been hammered until it became deformed....once again,congrats to me...haha

well while i was in the workshop,i saw the wielding and i thought of something...why cant the stupid doctor who operated my right collar bone just wield the whole bone back into shape so that i wont have to go for another operation...talking about that...i have to freaking go for an operation again to take out the steel...its like my worst nightmare....noo.....i dun wana operate...it will be my 3rd time entering the operation room in my entire life....sigh....BEN QU....thank you for your kind tackle which made me ended up like that...haha anyway its history...what can i do??kill you??yea right...haha

CGPA 3.7 here i comeeee.....i shall make it come true....1 more month till my final exam...

PS:charlene...im once again touched by the words written in you blog.and thanks for helping me through this mess and i really appreciate it.i owe you one.will buy you a treat when i go down.anyway im much happier now and more optimistic.thanks.miracles do happen and god has plans for you too.just like me.cheers :)